What to do When Your Children Talk Back at You
Monday, November 27, 2017
Whether it is a family from the Philippines or from other places, having strong family ties truly brings about positive and healthy outcomes. For children who attend the best international school in the Philippines, they are able to learn about the value of family very early on in their schooling.
These values would definitely stick with children as they grow up, as they will aid in fostering better relationships with their parents. However, growing pains among children and teens are inevitable, which can lead to challenges. One of them is when your children begin to talk back. This tends to happen when your children face pressure, which could ultimately affect their attitude and behavior. To help you deal with this issue, here are some effective ways to respond when your children talk back at you:
One of the first things that parents should do is to keep their composure and remain calm. Feeling rattled after your child has talked back? Maintaining a calm and rational mood would help iron things out. Doing the opposite would only bring about more conflict, and your children may grow to become more rebellious when they get older, which can risk a healthy parent-children relationship.
Listen to what they have to say
As a parent, it is important to listen to the concerns of your children. Since pressure is one of the common causes for children to talk back to their parents, this might mean that they want to air out a concern that they have in their minds. These concerns can be from school, friends, family, or even their interests. It is best to open your ears and hear what they would like to say to you.
Ask why they are talking back
Sometimes, children talk back because they saw someone else do it. Mimicry is common among young children, as this is one way that they are able to learn new skills. If talking back is a result of your children mimicking someone they saw, calmly tell them that it is not a good way to talk to their parents.
Encourage calm discussions
Children tend to be very energetic and animated when it comes to expressing themselves, and generally, that tends to be a good thing. However, when it comes to important matters that get them worried or tense, it is best to help them remain calm so that they would not get frustrated or agitated. Tell your children that it is better to remain calm in case of problems and pressure-packed situations.
Encourage a positive attitude
Positivity helps foster good behavior among children, which is why it is essential to encourage them to keep a bright outlook despite the challenges they may face. This would help them see that every situation can have a good outcome, and would definitely help them strive to improve and grow as individuals. They would be able to thrive in difficult situations while keeping their strong and good character intact.
Establish house rules
One of the best ways to develop discipline in your children is by laying out your own house rules. These house rules should be followed by your children, meaning that if they do not follow them, then they should be met with consequences that would help them improve.
One of these rules should include how you and your children would communicate with each other. This is helpful in case they begin to talk back. You can tell them that it is part of the house rules to not raise one’s voice when talking, especially to one’s parents.
Explain to them that talking back is not good
Sometimes, children talk back or throw tantrums not knowing that it is something negative. This is why it is best to explain in detail the effect of these actions. By helping them to comprehend this negative act, it would help them understand what actions are good and what are not.
Do not let them hide their emotions
While being calm is highly encouraged, you should also make it a point to not let your children hide their true feelings from you. Hiding their feelings would only bring about anger, frustration, and resentment within them – which in turn, would negatively affect their attitude.
Regularly ask them how they feel and see if they have any concerns that you can help them out with, as this can help them feel better and reaffirm them that they have a family that supports them.
Learning to communicate peacefully and without talking back is very essential, as it would define a child’s character growing up, as well as keep happy and harmonious relationships among family members. By showing your composure when they talk back, they would understand that it should not be done, and instead learn more about respecting one’s parents.