Even with the best teachers at your daughter’s international school in Manila, there may be times when it appears as though she may never seem to find the motivation to do school work and study.
There can be instances when she would much rather meet with friends and pursue other distractions after school is done. This attitude can instill bad habits and prevent her from reaching her full potential. Thus, it is your duty as a parent to help her.
To make the situation easier to solve, these are the different causes of demotivation in teens and how to fix them:
Fear of failure
Some teens enter high school with unrealistic expectations of perfectionism. Usually, this is a result of getting good grades in grade school as well as the high standards imposed by parents and teachers. Because they can be obsessed with doing a project “excellently” the first time, they end up postponing the work that has to be finished because they feel too anxious.
To help her avoid pursuing unhealthy perfectionist tendencies, it might be helpful to ask your daughter what external factors are making her worry so much. Usually, teenagers feel pressured to reach the level of achievements of their peers in school and on social media.
Once you are able to find out the exact reasons, help them understand the importance of mistakes and pitfalls. These challenges are never the end of the world, and these difficulties can help her do better in future situations.
Self-doubt
Self-doubt can prevent teenagers from doing well because it means that they may feel paralyzed by fear. Usually, they reach this level of insecurity because they can be prone to having negative thinking patterns. This pessimistic view could be attributed to their lack of emotional understanding. Unlike adults, teenagers tend to feel emotions more intensely because they rely on their amygdala, the brain part responsible for emotional reactions, to process things.
The best way teenagers can stop doubting themselves is by learning to talk to themselves in a positive manner. You can teach your teen to see life in a brighter light by telling her to stop saying these statements:
- This project is too much for me.
- I “have” to do this.
- I can never find time to study this subject.
Remind them that saying these phrases during difficult times can be more helpful:
- I will take this one step at a time.
- What are my own reasons for choosing to do this?
- I can find time to study later on.
Anger
It is no secret that teenagers tend to be very moody. Your daughter may be prone to procrastination because she is too angry at you or her teachers. It may be a sign of passive-aggressive rebellion.
If she is upset with you and it stops her from performing, you could follow these steps to make the situation better:
First, ask your daughter the reasons for her anger. Give her space if needed. Once you know the answers, firmly tell her the boundaries when it comes to expressing emotions. It is not healthy for her to take out her negative emotions on school and that reinforcing this habit will be detrimental to her future.
Key Takeaway
As a teenager, your daughter is facing a lot. These could be the factors contributing to her procrastination as a student of an international school in Manila. As illustrated in this list, the causes of demotivation in teens may vary with each individual case, but for the most part, they are based on their emotions. As a parent, you can help fix their lack of motivation by teaching them to control their unhelpful feelings.
